Letting go

In Blackwater Woods

Look, the trees
are turning
their own bodies
into pillars

of light,
are giving off the rich
fragrance of cinnamon
and fulfillment,

the long tapers
of cattails
are bursting and floating away over
the blue shoulders

of the ponds,
and every pond,
no matter what its
name is, is

nameless now.
Every year
everything
I have ever learned

in my lifetime
leads back to this: the fires
and the black river of loss
whose other side

is salvation,
whose meaning
none of us will ever know.
To live in this world

you must be able
to do three things:
to love what is mortal,
to hold it

against your bones knowing
your own life depends on it,
and, when the time comes to let it go,
to let it go.

—Mary Oliver

 

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To Naomi

…nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility:whose texture
compels me with the color of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens;only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody,not even the rain,has such small hands

e.e. cummings, from somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond

A traveler has no fixed plans…

…and is not intent on arriving.”  — Lao Tzu

However, a traveler with lung cancer gets tired, and Home can be a nice place indeed, especially in Indian Summer.  Hello, sunny Bay Area!   Note to self:  unpack winter clothing before husband makes garage inpenetrable.  I was horrifically unprepared for east coast weather (due to being locked out of the garage), so I was most uncomfortable while wandering the cute stores on Warren St. in Hudson, NY.  

The  journey began with 97 degree heat in Los Angeles for the Paul Weller concert.  New Jersey and Philadelphia were milder and somewhat sunny after a storm.  The trees were magnificent through New Jersey, and I managed a glimpse of “Drumthwacket”—the governor’s mansion in Princeton, NJ!!  New York started out crisp and sunny.   What a difference a day makes.  32 degrees and snowing the very next day.  No wonder I feel so bedraggled!

This week has been a marvel of warmth and light.   I actually tried to garden, which may account for the soreness and the wicked sunburn.  At least I hope that’s all it is…

The journey east was bittersweet and inspirational.  It was life-changing and too close to my heart to discuss right now.  A reminder that Vox had the EASY button called Privacy Settings for use on moments like these.

My thoughts are scattered and unresolved, so I’ll close with a picture taken on the 36th Street Walkway through the University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia.