Floating in a fog of uncertainty. I need to remember each day that I’m living on borrowed time, and to make the most of it. In other words, should I be spending this much time worrying about things like health insurance and all the niggling little bills?
The answer is probably no, just throw money at it and make it go away. If there was ever a time to do something like that, it would be now. Now would be the time to focus on last pleasures, not on whether I’m wasting money. Wasting time would be the sin now, as I can’t make any more of it, can I? Is it worth another minute of my remaining life fretting about $3000 or whatever it is I’ll be paying on top of the sum I already fork over for my illness? Probably not. I should move on to exercising, framing pictures, writing letters to loved ones, and generally getting my affairs in order. If I do that, I may live another year, which I might actually enjoy.
Sometimes I lose sight of the trees for the forest.